November 2012
21 posts
B L O G C L O S E D
oh boy
what now?
==>
It’s cute and I’m happy…
but I can’t help the jealousy creeping in.
It’s all I can do to keep it out.
1 tag
there's an old voice in my head that's holding me...
well tell her that i miss our little talks
soon it will be over and buried with our past
we used to play outside when we were young and full of life and full of love
some days i don’t know if i am wrong or right
your mind is playing tricks on you my dear
‘cause though the truth may vary this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore
Perhaps I should close this blog down, hm?
I don’t need it anymore, it seems.
Wow this is really bad the tea didn’t help
Maybe if i drank more water and wasn’t as dehydrated it might help a litt le
Ohh man cramps ohhhh fuck me sideways
Nope.
Just nope.
I need to get away, at least for a few days.
I promised myself I wouldn’t get involved, even if it was one of my better friends.
1 tag
i'm coming home,
i’m coming home…
tell the world i’m coming home…
let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday…
i know my kingdom awaits, and they’ve forgiven my mistakes…
i’m coming home…
i’m coming home…
tell the world i’m coming home…
smtskulltrumpeter asked: sorry about not trying to help tho i just wasn't sure if i could do anything <.< i'm really sorry how things are going, but if you ever need to talk about 'em, i can try to help.
i’m kind of disappointed that no one asked me to clarify upon those reasons
oh well whatever it’s not important anyway
When I say I’m done… I really mean it.
I literally cannot handle this despair that I legitimately feel over these characters.
And there’s no way for me to tone down that connection unless I cut it off altogether.
it makes me really uncomfortable when people talk about like
whether someone’s cute or attractive because i just don’t???? feel it???
it’s why i can’t hang out with people like emily and sam and denise because they talk about boys and i just can’t do that
whenever anyone shows me a picutre of a guy and they’re like “this dude’s hot,...
LIKE I’M NOT EVEN KIDDING I ALREADY FELT REALLY BAD THEN THAT LIKE KICKED ME IN THE GUT I GOT ON MY PHONE AFTER GETTING ON THEBUS AND THAT’S LIKE THE FIRST THING I SEE, I LITERALLY STARED AT IT MOUTH AGAPE FOR LIKE 5 MINUTES
SOMEONE GET ME WRECK-IT RALPH TO CHEER ME UP STAT
I’M GONNA THROW UP MOTORCITY NOT BEING PICKED UP FOR A SECOND SEASON IS UNACCEPTABLE AND DISTRESSING
Ruffles have ridges
“When you’re happy you enjoy the music. But when you’re sad, you understand the...”
– Frank Ocean (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
“Anyone can hide. Facing up to things, working through them, that’s what makes...”
– Sarah Dessen (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
Nevermind. I just checked out the school’s policy on dropping classes past the 4th week of school and let me tell you it doesn’t look good at all.
I think I’d rather take the C: I’d still get a 4.1 GPA if I brought my math grade up from a B to an A. I guess.
Doesn’t mean my parents aren’t still going to give me hell about it, but, whatever.
I really should talk to my counselor about classes, because I hate AP Chem so much, and I don’t think I really actually need the class to do well in a Visual Arts major… I wish I had realized this sooner… now it’s already almost halfway through the year, way too late to switch to something else… ugh. My only other option would be to drop AP Chem for, like, honours...
Does one ever actually grow up?
My parents talk about adults who act like teenagers but…
To be honest, I’ve been observing a lot of adults and it doesn’t seem like they act much differently than teenagers…
Not really.
“Men at some time are masters of their fates:
The fault, dear Brutus, is not in...”
– Cassius, Julius Caesar
October 2012
172 posts
I hate being so indecisive
1 tag
smtskulltrumpeter asked: oh no im sorry virtual hug for you
1 tag
smtskulltrumpeter asked: also im sorry i didnt see your post yesterday but i dont think your voice is annoying i think it sounds nice
2 tags
ohhh fuck me sideways i remembered that empty eye sockets are holes when looking at a picture that had like… the eye filled in with black but the other normal sorta like this
ugh i think i almost threw up i’m still feeling queasy
My voice is so annoying.
harrytouchme:
the best advice i could give anyone: nothings embarrassing unless you make it embarrassing
also
stop caring what other people think because 98% of the time theY DON’T ACTUALLY CARE YOU’RE MAKING IT ALL UP IN YOUR HEAD
So I reblogged that on the wrong blog.
Whoops.
Why did my phone even default to meenaworldproblems in the first place…
1 tag
gonnaslapabitch:
do you ever feel like you have a crush on someone and then the next day you’re like wow no it’s just friendship
and it’s a constant cycle of wow ilu oh wait no i dont no nvm yes i do ah no false alarm
it’s so confusing
1 tag
gonnaslapabitch:
do you ever feel like you have a crush on someone and then the next day you’re like wow no it’s just friendship
and it’s a constant cycle of wow ilu oh wait no i dont no nvm yes i do ah no false alarm
it’s so confusing
“IRL Friends”
“In Real Life Friends”
Does that mean whenever I say that, I’m saying you guys aren’t real?
That’s upsetting. I never thought about that before.
Sometimes it pains me to realize that I really do act my age.
That was further proven in the last half hour.
I spent it trying not to feel uncomfortable.
Fun, yeah?
I feel disconnected.
There’s a thick, solid, dark coloured barrier between me and you guys, it feels like.
But if I look at it from the side, it’s probably paper thin.
I need to snap out of it.
But how?
2 tags
Oh well.
Whatever.
I miss the group calls.
They were the only time I felt like a part of the group, really.
I thought we were going to go a lot longer without me feeling like a third wheel again, but, hey, that’s not your faults. That’s mine.
I do miss the conversations, dearly.
But really, there’s no way you guys can talk to me all the time.
And whenever I’m not talking to someone, quite frankly, I feel like shit.
And I worry. I worry, and worry, and worry.
And it’s tiring.
Drown your sorrows and insecurities.
I understand why some people bury themselves in their work;
If they do that, then they don’t have the time to worry and doubt themselves.
This is part of the reason I haven’t been online all day, erry day.
I’ve realized I feel my worst when I’m sitting around at the computer or whatever.
Can I close my eyes and just die?
This was a tiring day.
Seems fitting for it to be my final day.
Happy endings are elusive, hanging just out of your reach.
Even if you obtain that, will you actually be satisfied?
I wouldn’t, not really.
I’ll still have the yearning for something else deep within my core.
It seems like the posts I typed up within the last...
I’ll type them in again. If you see them twice, I apologize.
I’m upset because when I look at Miru, Birdie, and Kiwi’s art, I’m not getting awestruck anymore.
It… I don’t know.
I feel like less of a person for not just going and gushing “dang” all over their art, which isn’t right.
I’m still a person, I’m still a good person……..
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s like all I can do is...”
– The Perks of Being a Wallflower
1 tag
i did it like this,
i did it like that,
and it always comes back somehow
i don’t know how
to break this pattern down.
(down, down, down, down)
i think i’ve been here before,
i think i’ve run into you,
i know the things that you do,
‘cause this is déjà vu …
1 tag
Somehow, we got enrolled into some other school.
Us students at SDHS, I mean. And got mixed with the students of the other school. Maybe it was just one class, because I only saw, like, three other people I knew in the dream.
I walked into a random English class, and I knew it wasn’t mine. For whatever reason, I didn’t have a schedule so I really didn’t know what class I...
Bleh. I don’t even know what this disgusting feeling welling up in me is. Is it jealousy? I can’t even tell anymore, it’s a constant feeling whenever I think about you guys or talk with you guys.
1 tag
Fuck.
Missed the bus, ran to one of the later bus stops. Think I missed that, too. Unless I didn’t.
So glad my brother came back for me when I called.
Also feel bad.
My brother carts me around everywhere. And what do I do for him?
He’s going to be late for work, too. Goddamnit.
11 tags
Fake fake fake fake fake fake fake fake fake fake fake.
